Tesco stops selling 'fiddly' curvy croissants

Social media outcry as Tesco dumbs down croissants

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Tesco has announced that it will no longer sell its own traditional crescent-shaped croissants, and will instead only make straight ones. Apparently Brits don't like the bother of having to spread jam on a curve.

The supermarket announced today that the difficulties involved in putting jam on a curved croissant meant that sales were falling. A survey of customers revealed that three quarters preferred their patisserie to be straight, so they are straightening up their own-brand offerings to boost sales.

Tesco said in a statement: "At the heart of the move away from curved croissants is the 'spreadability' factor. The majority of shoppers find it easier to spread jam, or their preferred filling, on a straighter shape with a single sweeping motion. With the crescent shaped croissants, it's more fiddly and most people can take up to three attempts to achieve perfect coverage, which increases the potential for accidents involving sticky fingers and tables."

On Twitter, many users couldn't believe the news, with some asking "Is this a joke?" Some were "struggling to believe it", and others said it was a bit early for April Fools gags. Others believed it, but were decidedly unimpressed. One wrote: "Sometimes I'm embarrassed to be British", while another added: "@tesco now catering to the lazy."

There were plenty who pointed out that croissant actually means crescent in French. One said: "@Tesco Croissant means 'crescent' so nope, they need a whole new name. It's just odd". Another pointed out: "It's.... it's just not a croissant any more, though, is it?"

There were others who suggested it may all be designed to coincide with David Cameron's visit to Brussels for renegotiation talks over Europe. One said: "UK moves further away from Europe: Tesco stop selling curved croissants in favour of straight ones", while another added: "Tesco makes a stand against treacherous curved foreign pastries."

It's not known how Tesco customers are dealing with the almost impossible challenges posed by bagels, English muffins and crumpets.

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